Directions: Take a standard joke structure (such as “What do you get when you cross a ____ with a ___”) and split up unto three lines. Write one line, fold and pass. The next person writes the next line in the sequence without seeing the preceding one.
What did the tree root say to the undertaker?
I think I’m at the wrong house.
What did the monkey who just learned sign language say to the NPR interviewer?
Licking the melting arctic ice is not the same as licking the ice cream cone.
Why did Jesus Christ go to the bathroom with no door?
Because his mother was forcing him to wear a fat sweater.
Why did the toothpaste factory abandon the hatchlings in the cemetery?
They were feeling outrageously horny and needed some privacy.
Why did Donald Rumsfield drop out of Kennesaw State University?
He was feeling lonely and just wanted someone to talk to.
Why did the auto mechanic buy the nun dinner at Sizzler’s?
To finally decode the mysterious signal sent to earth from the alien artifact.
What do you get when you cross a chocolate covered grasshopper with an obnoxiously loud raven?
A squash casserole.
What do you get when you cross a lettuce wrap with the new testament?
Course credit for the second semester of physics at an Alabama high school.
Why did the depressed professor of etymology pull a fast one?
A simple desire for companionship.
Why did Lucy (of I Love Lucy fame) eat a thousand and one sandwiches?
To finally catch a break instead of a cold for a change.
Why did the Bond villain lend his brother twenty thousand dollars?
To see if they had any snacks in there.
Why did the unhatched eggs stuff themselves with quesadillas?
The world may never know…
Why did the donkey’s mouth toil away in the fields until body and bone was used up and ruined?
Because his store on Etsy selling baskets wasn’t making any money, so his wife told him he needed to get a real job.
Why did the mayor of Stockbridge shit on the floor with embarrassment?
Because nothing is true and everything is permitted.
What did the smooth porcupine say to the blowfish?
It’s a bit cold out here to be doing something like that, don’t you think?
What did the pus-filled sore say to the statue of an orangutan?
You should always check your pockets before you put your hands in there.
What do you get when you cross a cheese pizza with a melting clock from a Salvador Dali painting?
Ghost clown appearing before your very eyes.
What do you get when you cross a water-logged marshmallow with a wise man’s blanket?
The craziest New Year’s Eve party I’ve ever been to.
What do you get when you cross a nightmare your cat had last night with a very empty bird nest?
The U in UFO.
What did the transcendental meditation guru say to the expired cadaver?
Do you ever wish you’d never been born?
What did the white rapper say to the depressed pair of jeans?
I think I’m gonna need another drink.
What did the robotic feline say to the ghost of his childhood pet hamster?
I think we have a lot in common. Want to go out with me?
What do you get when you cross a lion with a Jack-O-Lantern?
Your own demise.
What do you get when you cross a melting phoenix with a wishy-washy antelope?
Unbearable, eternal pain.
What did the politician say to the mirror in his studio apartment?
You will not know peace until you have tried my new amazing lotion.
Players: AM, SC, HC, T, JF
